how rude!

in the notorious words of stephanie tanner, HOW RUDE! flash back to 1:03PM, i walk across the street to Pret-A-Manger, (which i always thought was Pret-A-Manager) to buy an undoubtedly overpriced lunch. ive never ventured into this store before, and after today, probably never will again (this specific location, probably will stumble into a Pret-A-Manger once again in my life).

let me set the scene: a dreary tuesday, raining, cold, 1 day between me and a four day weekend. 

act 1: i forgot to pack lunch so i need something quick. i walk into a crowded glorified deli, spend a good 10 minutes looking over people's shoulders to decide which sandwich i want. i decide on turkey with pesto, which i know wont be super satisfying, but it will do. then i wander over to the soups. butternut squash apple, sold. next a can of diet coke (i know its horrible for you, still not sure why, but whatever, i felt like a carbonated drink today)

act 2: standing on line with one person in front of me, just staring at the food display. it's my turn to pay and this is the conversation that transpired...

pret-a-manger prick: are you sick?
me: no but thats really insulting, because im not sick, but youre telling me i look sick
pret-a-manger prick: no, its just you walked in here all mopey (and to add insult to injury he proceeds to mimic what he thinks my face looks like)
me: (no words for what feels like 10 minutes) im at work and its raining, doesnt really warrant a smile
in an alternate universe where i say what's really on my mind: am i sick? fuck you! do you realize how rude of a question that is? when someone is sick they are generally a lesser version of them self, so are you asking me if i am a lesser version of myself today? no, i am not sick. are you sick? you must be, for asking me that question. or maybe you're socially inept? yes, yes that must be it. ring up my lunch asshole. how are you interacting with customers right now? you shouldn't be. get me a manager.
pret-a-manger: (as  he hands me my card back)have a wonderful day and a pleasant thanksgiving!
me: (i just give him my best 'sick' face glare and proceed out the door)

this sort of conversation should never happen! first of all, i'm wearing make up today so im not even pale looking. second of all, you're just a cashier, even if i was sick, what is it your business? i should have responded, yes i have small pox, is my $30 sandwich free now? 

it is no ones business to tell me to smile more, ask me if im sick, or assume im in a bad mood because i dont sit behind my desk or walk into a store with a fucking smile from ear to ear. if i walked into a store and was gleaming from ear to ear whistling dixie, then, and only then can you assume im sick. call the psych ward asap.